So sue me.

I haven't written a blog in three days when I said I was going to try to write every day. So sue me. But right now everything just seems so hard. I don't really want to post my pity party on the web; just let me say that I've been spending a lot of time sitting around staring at walls. Bored but nothing appeals to me. Ever felt that way?

But if I don't post a pity party, what do I post?? I just don't know. Sitting here trying to come up with some happy joy thoughts isn't working.

Bleah. This whole deal isn't working. Calgon take me away.

maybe I'll try again tomorrow.

Did I Mention...

...that we saw Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix at the midnight show on Wednesday morning? I kind of don't think I did.

I'm getting pretty upset with these movies as they go on. The first two were cute and the third was excellent. But as the books get longer the movies get more and more compressed, with more and more left out--which causes more and more to have to be left out--which causes.....you get my drift.

For example, in CoS, the scene between Harry and Filch where Harry discovers Filch is a Squib never takes place. So Squibs are never explained. So when Arabella Figg shows up in OotP, it's like, "Who is this batty old woman and why is she appearing right now?" You don;t know she's a squib; she can't be a squib because in the world of the movies squibs don't exist.

And what about Bill Weasley? He never got introduced in Goblet of Fire. So the connection between him and Fleur hasn't happened. How are they going to handle that in movie six where a great deal is made of the fact that the two are engaged? And I can't know for sure, but it seems like the Weasley wedding is going to be a big scene in book seven--I'm actually imagining bad things happening. Are they just going to cut that or are they going to introduce Bill at the last minute or what?

Don;t get me wrong-these movies have some fine things about them, not the least in the casting. But I think all the script cuts really detract from the experience. And the inconsistency in direction with the constant change of directors is really starting to annoy me. It seems to me that would leave way too much burden on the actors--especially the ones who have been recurring characters--for making their characters consistent. You can see that in the change in Dumbledore from movie three to movie four to movie five--he's different every time and though I like Michael Gambon I can't say I like all the changes.

These movies are made for people who have already read the books, because if you haven't read the books you can't understand them, especially the later ones. But they do the books a great disservice by rushing through plot details and compressing scenes to the point of incoherence.

rant over and out

okay that's weird.

I just tried to sigh in and they wouldn;t let me sign in but when I came back to my blog page, there was the option for a new post. I don't get it. Magic.

I am following my vow--I hope--to post something every day even if it's trivia. So today's trivia is: the weather is better than it has been. Cloudcover maing the sky grey but the temps cooler. Not the blazing hot above 100 degree temps we had last week, thank whatever god you prefer.

getting life stabilised: that's another weird thing. since finding out I'm bipolar--and I still can;t believe no one got that sooner in my life, I mean HELLO!-- and getting on meds that make me have a normal thought and emotional process....well, I can understand why most bipolar people go off their meds, can;t I? Even now I;m thinking, okay, I'm stable, can I stop taking some of these pills please. Eventhough I know it's early for that.

But I miss....I don't miss the lows so much, although they were feeling something. But I miss those rare and ...infinitely valuable highs when everything felt like it came together and made sense and everything was going to go right and I was so inspired I;d forget to eat and just work until my eyes fell out. How much harder it is doing the work from this flat place, how do people function like this???? Is this what normal life is? I just can't bear it sometimes. Is this health? I suppose these are questions for my p-sychiatrist when I see him next

I doubt I will like his answers....

where have I been?

I last posted in February. It is now July? Where have I been?

Hanging around various forums.

playing casual games on my computer.

not reading as much as I used to.

learning to play the new flute I got (yes I got it).

joining Weight Watchers.

Doing radio.

Trying to work on a new book.

Trying to wrok on an old book.

basically trying to get my life together.

I'm going to TRY to make myself post something every day even if it's not much. As a discipline.

that's all for now

K.